Monday, July 18, 2016

DISCUSSION: Why do I feel the need to apologize?

Maybe you have noticed that I have been a bit absent on the blog lately. Or maybe I am not nearly as important as I thought and you haven’t noticed anything amiss.

In the middle of June, I left Italy and visited my family and my husband’s family and my best friend in the span of almost three weeks. It was a whirlwind. While I did schedule some blog posts for that time period, I put in ZERO effort for my blog during that time. I was part adapting to the time change and part enjoying some quality time with the people I loved.

Last week, I returned and I am still playing catch-up thanks to the exhaustion that comes from jet lag. I actually thought about apologizing for being away, but then I thought: why do I feel the need to do that?
 We all have our own lives. And yes, on the one hand, I feel bad that I didn’t have time to respond to comments or read all of your blogs or write some new discussion posts or about a million other things. But on the other hand, I really don’t feel bad. I wanted to devote myself to relaxing with my family and friends as much as possible and I had a great time. I didn’t even take that many pictures because I was just trying to enjoy the moments.
I am not sure why I feel the need to apologize. Maybe I feel bad for taking a much needed break. Or I feel like you guys are waited with bated breath for me to respond to your comments and I imagine you guys getting angry when I don't and thinking very bad things about me. I have a high opinion of myself, don't I?
In the past, I have apologized if I fell behind with my blogging stuff or if I took a break, but I really shouldn't. Everyone needs a break. Blogging is also just a hobby. It's a pretty awesome hobby and I love doing it, but the last thing I want is for it to start feeling like an obligation. Once it becomes an obligation, it becomes less fun and that's the last thing I want. 

So no more apologies! 

Do you feel the need to apologize when you take a break from blogging?

22 comments :

  1. Nope! You should not apologize at all. I think sometimes bloggers put too much pressure on themselves when it comes to their blogs and forget that this is first and foremost a hobby, not a job. It's good to be focused on a hobby like blogging, but making it the center of their lives is a bit much. I'm glad you took a break! I hope it was refreshing and you had a wonderful time!

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    1. So true Nick!! I am TRYING SO HARD to refrain from apologizing, but it's gotten to be such a habit of mine. I did have a great time and I am happy to (slowly) be getting back in the swing of things!

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  2. I definitely have a bad habit of apologizing all the time - even through times when I don't even have anything to apologize for. I guess it's been a reflex or something of mine - I just find myself blurting out "I'm sorry" before I can even think about it.

    Then again, you do have a point there. I guess, as the owner of our own blogs, we can do what we want with it too. We can take a break if we want to, or hang out with our friends and/or family whenever. In the end, we'll surely come back to our blogs anyway. :D Great post, Cynthia!

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    1. Mara, maybe it's also a woman thing? I know so many women who apologize even when they do nothing wrong! Then again, my husband does that too, so maybe it just varies from person to person. Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  3. Oh my goodness do not apologize! I take breaks like every couple of months just to kind of let it go for a bit or catch up and I think it is the best. Glad you had a great time away !!

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  4. You don't have to apologize. (but I totally get what you're saying)

    Glad you had a good visit!

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  5. THIS WAS ME BEFORE. And I also took one week off from blogging, not doing anything or worrying about catching up. And it was great! And I of course won't be apologizing for it, though I totally get why we all feel the need to.

    Don't worry. No matter how long you're gone, we'll always be here to greet you (well I will at least.)

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    1. Thank you so much Valerie!! I am so appreciative of that. I am getting back in the swing of things and I love it. The vacation away was just what I needed.

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  6. YAY NO MORE APOLOGIES!! *cheers for you* Honestly I think we as an entire blogosphere spend WAY too much time feeling bad that we're "failing". But I mean, who is setting this bar??? I don't even believe in catching-up anymore...like if I go on hatius and a post gets to be 2 or 3 weeks old and I didn't get everyone's comments? Then I just go on! I mean, life is not going to END if I don't respond. They'll still visit my blog if I miss their comment this one time. It's noooot the end of the world. XD
    I'm glad you've had a good time away with your holidays and hiatuses!

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    1. Cait, you are SO RIGHT! And I swear, I just compare myself to others who blog all the time and respond to comments every single time. So then I feel the need to apologize when I don't measure up. Insanity! I am glad that you guys won't bang down my door and beat me up for responding to a few of your comments. :) And the holiday was just what I needed.

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  7. I haven't had a chance to take a break yet, but everyone has the right to a life. A blog isn't a job, and people get to take a break from jobs. Hope you had a wonderful time.

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    1. Thank you so much! My holiday was so fun and relaxing and I loved it. No apologies! Thanks for understanding.

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  8. Good for yoU! I am glad you decided not to apologize, you totally shouldn't have to! None of us should- though I am absolutely guilty of doing it myself 😂 I am so glad that you got to spend time with family and friends too, that is wonderful, and should definitely come first! Glad you're back, too, of course ♥

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    1. Thank you Shannon! I apologized so much for it when I first started. But then I realized that you guys probably won't stop reading my blog if I miss a comment or two. :) My vacation was just what I needed. I am so happy to be getting back in the swing of things though.

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  9. I've been posting way less often lately too, and I have had to fight the urge to apologize. I HAVE explained what's been going on that's keeping us busy, but I've kept the I'm sorries out of it - good for us!

    Nicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction

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    1. Good for you Nicole! I absolutely love your posts, but I don't hold it against you if you don't post every day or if you don't respond to every single one of my comments. I don't know why I hold myself up to such a high standard. No more though. :)

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  10. I don't think there's any need to apologize, but I do appreciate it when bloggers let readers know they're taking a break. I actually worry if I see someone has not been posting for a while without giving any reason! That said, life happens, this is a hobby not a job for most of us, and you should do what works for you! It's more about communicating than being sorry, I think.

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    1. Lory, oh yeah that is true. If I were going to take an extended break from blogging, I am sure I would let you guys know. But I guess I feel like I have to apologize for even taking a break from reading blogs and commenting and stuff like that. If I take a few days or a week off from blogging, I probably wouldn't say anything. But any longer than that and I would communicate for sure. I wouldn't want to just disappear on anyone. :)

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  11. I think the need to apologise means you love what blogging and the blogging community means to you... but you're right, you definitely don't need to apologise. Family and real life and all of that always comes first, I think.

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    1. Verushka, that is very true. I love all of my readers so I don't want to disappoint anyone. And I don't want to over apologize either. It's all about trying to strike a good balance. :)

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